Man kissing his girlfriend

Edging 101 – How To Get Started

Edging or orgasm control can be achieved through masturbation or help from a partner. We have partnered up with Bait’D Designs BDSM, Sex, and Jewelry Blog to teach you about edging 101 how to get started.

“When you are pulling against the restraints… when your back is arched and your hips are writhing… when your mouth is open in a silent scream of tortured rapture… you will know that my work has begun”. – Pleasure Torture

What is Edging?

During sex, BDSM, and kinks, achieving orgasms is not the only thing that can bring you or your partner pleasure. Edging is a popular method that involves controlling orgasms by bringing you or your partner to the brink of orgasm, and then right before it happens, you back away.

Then you repeat this process over and over again, building up your sexual energy until you or your partner finally allow you to achieve an orgasm. The sexual energy building up to an orgasm can be similar to the sexual energy you build from celibacy.

You can repeat the edging process multiple times to intensify you or your partner’s orgasm. For men, this exercise can increase the volume of ejaculation and force of ejaculation. This can be effective especially for men who suffer from premature ejaculation.

Other popular terms that can describe the act of edging are peaking, surfing, or riding the edge.

Edging 101 How to Get Started

Edging For Women

This is a difficult process to master.

You want to focus on getting her to approach an orgasm.  But don’t let it actually happen. Some people find it beneficial for the women to alert their partner when they are getting close to an orgasm.  So that their partner knows when to back off.

When men typically hear that their women is about to ‘cum’, their usual instinct is to go harder.  But in the case of edging, this requires some discipline from both participants.  It is important to remember that as you are edging a woman, the smallest change can make a huge impact.

Sometimes change will make a women lose the build up to an orgasm

Or it may bring her over the edge. Losing an orgasm will send her into the refractory period.  Then you will have to start over to build up that orgasm again. Staying consistent is key and the lighter touch, the better. In fact, 70% of women who like edging say lighter touches help to reduce the pressure when climax is near.

Everyone is different so what works for one women may not work for another.

If you are going in solo you will also need to have some discipline as well.

Our natural instinct is to keep going when something feels good.  So you will need to be able to slow down and prevent yourself from orgasm, especially since you know your body best.

There are a variety of methods you can use to perform edging on a woman, but the easiest would be with the external clit (or clitoris). You can perform edging on your lady partner by rubbing, licking, and other movements.

For a more advanced way to edge a women, you can try G-spot stimulation. The G-spot orgasm is harder to control because you are dealing with the sensitivity of the vagina walls, as well as vulva stimulation.

It is recommended that you start out with a vibrator or dildo instead to stay more consistent in this area if you are just starting to learn how to edge.

edging 101 how to get started
Image:Dom overpowering woma

Edging For Men

Benefits for edging men include increased testosterone levels, lasting longer during sex, and self-discipline. Edging for men also helps to minimize or overcome premature ejaculation when done properly and consistently.

During the edging process you are using ways to delay ejaculation and get your brain to be comfortable achieving a high level of sexual pleasure without ejaculating.  Much like edging for a women, edging a man also follows the same principles. The giver and receiver must be disciplined and not get over excited during this process.

Edging for a man can occur with a hand job, blow job, vibrating cock ring, or whatever tickles your fancy. Let your imagination explore the possibilities. It is recommended that edging is done without the use of porn for a more controlled environment.

For men, there is also a popular ballooning technique

That is similar to the edging, but a lot of men who have done it feel it is better than edging.  Ballooning begins by masturbating and gently rubbing the sensitive part of the penis until full erection is achieved.

Continue to stimulate and then just before ejaculation, you slow down the stimulation. At this time, you should incorporate medium Kegels exercises as you inhale, and then release the Kegels as you exhale.

You should increase the intensity of the Kegels upon every inhale, and repeat this process just like you are doing reps in the gym. During intercourse, this technique can also provide a stimulating effect for the women.

Edging As A Dominant

Edging is often used as a way for a dominant to take control of their submissive by using erotic denial as control. Some masters allow their slave to masturbate without orgasm.

Masters will usually give their slaves tasks and will tell a slave how many times during the day they should take themselves to the edge of orgasm and stop. The slave learns that their orgasms are owned by their master and practices control and discipline. The master can also incorporate punishments when they orgasm.

Beyond edging, orgasm control for a dominant or master can also mean not allowing your slave/submissive to stop cumming until they beg you to stop.

It’s always beneficial to spice up your sexual routine. Now you know the basics, so get out there and experience edging for yourself! Whether you are going in solo, edging your partner, or receiving, the benefits from edging will help enhance you and your partner’s sex life for the better.

edging 101 how to get started
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My Biggest Weakness Is Now My Greatest Asset

How I Stopped Playing With Myself!

With a title like that, you’d automatically assume that this is click bait. Firstly, how does any good come from not masturbating and what would I get out of not getting that instant gratification and pleasure that masturbating gives me?

What type of weakness do you even associate with masturbating?

It’s one of the best things man has invented since Nutella! And how can not masturbating help create a great asset in my life?

A little bit of a backstory for this blog post.

Firstly, I am notoriously in-consistent. Consistency and I have a very turbulent relationship. Put it this way, you can literally visualise my consistency levels as a flight from Sydney to Melbourne. The plane goes really fast up into the air to gain momentum, then it maintains a steady pace for 40 minutes and then it slowly descends and comes to a holt.

I start things really fast and get all excited and motivated, then it slowly mellows and then comes to a complete stop in a short period of time.

How does this tie in to masturbating?

Around 3 years ago whilst I was working in Adultsmart I was told by a fellow staff member that masturbation is healthy for you because it clears out your epididymis.  This is where your sperm is held in your body.

So immediately I began masturbating once a day (another weakness, I’m an extremist).  Then slowly it sort of became a mini addiction and I would do it religiously (Keep in mind an addiction is not consistency).

Fast forward 3 years

I have a girlfriend now and have cut it down to 4 – 5 times a week which is also significantly a lot.

I came across an article which was about a Reddit movement known as #NoFap, in other words they are pretty much on a masturbation strike.  I found it really interesting so I read over the benefits of it and realized that it is exactly what I need at this moment of time in my life.

I would also reduce some of the negative symptoms of constantly watching porn and masturbating that were slowly creeping into my life. I came up with a plan to kill two birds.

(My inconsistency and masturbation addiction) with one stone (The NoFap challenge).

So how does it work and what are the benefits of it?

Well first I’ll talk about what it has done for me in regards to my inconsistency. Every single day (I am day 53 now) I wake up with morning glory like every other male on the planet however I do not act on it. I created a set routine that I have to follow which will prime me for my day and keep me on track to not fapping.

I wake up first thing I do is have a big glass of water, wash my face, brush my teeth, make my bed and do 4 sets of push ups. Now keep in mind, I never used to do this 54 days ago.  But I knew that If I do the exact same thing every single morning.  I can prime myself and keep focused on a goal I want instead of having my thoughts all over the shop.

By doing this simple routine, it has kept me grounded and also consistent.

I have for the first time in a long time, built a consistent base of habits that benefit me. Being consistent has made me much more confident in tackling long term projects and achieving goals that are longer than 1 to 2 weeks. Plus the push-ups have my chest looking sick.

How has not masturbating or watching porn helped me over the last 54 days? WELL LET ME TELL YOU!

Not only are my energy levels up, I feel 5x more confident, more focused with less mind smoggy.  My workouts are a lot better because I have more testosterone running through my body.  My sex life has improved dramatically because the hunt switch has turned back on so instead of being lazy and just masturbating.

I get excited for sex much more now

Instead of being tired or not interested. Not masturbating has literally done wonders for all aspects of my life. I’m not just floating through life, I am driven, I am focused and my mind is much stronger.

I think that not masturbating has literally lead to all the positive habits that are slowly but confidently being executed into my life. Since I’ve stopped, I have become more consistent with the gym, my actions at work and really found a new appreciation for my sex life with my partner.

It has reassured me that everything in life is fueled by choices, positive ones lead to positive results, negative ones lead to negative results. How ironic, I know get more satisfaction from now cumming then I do from cumming. PS.

Don’t think that because you don’t masturbate this means you have to abstain from sex also.

If anything, it pushes you to have more sex. Good hunting.


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