Anal sex with a woman

A Tight-arse’s Guide To Starting Anal Play

“That is an exit only” that used to be my catchcry. As a lady with irritable bowel syndrome (IBS) the idea of engaging in any kind of anal play made me nervous.

However when I began to working at Oh! Zone Adult Lifestyle Centres my eyes were opened. Now I have begun my anal journey and I’m happy to be on it. What changed? Knowledge. So I am here to share some for any other nervous butts out there.

Cleaning Before Anal Play And Anal Sex

The main issue I hear with people about anal sex is the hygiene factor. And I get it, it was my main concern also. No matter what porn shows you have watched, anal sex has the potential to be a messy endeavour and so a good prepping (prepping is a slang term for preparing) routine is key to a clean experience.

You have a few options but the main two are a douche or an enema. They both do the same thing as far as squirting water up your bum but the douche uses less water (with the look of a big eye dropper, almost!) and gives more of a clean of the immediate and used area.

Anal douche
Image: Anal Fantasy Collection EZ Clean Douche Kit

My preferred method is an enema, it uses a larger amount of water (the one I have connects to my tap) and generally does a deeper clean. With an enema you generally hold in the water for 5 or so minutes whereas with a douche it is normally pushed out a bit sooner.

Enema
Image: Rinservice The BUTTler Enema Bag

Both of these products will help remove most matter from the anal cavity and will have you feeling fresh, clean and ready to play.

Personal Lubricant For Anal Play

When it comes to anal play lube isn’t optional. The anal cavity (unlike the vagina) isn’t naturally lubricating and because of that for any kind of enjoyable anal play session a good lube is a must.

For anal play a silicone or thick water based lubricant is best however why stop there? Thanks to some intelligent and thoughtful lube makers you can now purchase lubes that come with relaxant. Basically what this will do is help your anus relax and slightly loosen making insertion much easier.

This relaxant isn’t numbing so you will still have sensation. I think this is quite important when starting your anal journey. Something that numbs you completely will make it difficult to tell if you like or don’t like something and also if your body needs a break or possibly even if something has been torn it would be hard to tell until much later.

My Favourite Lubricant

Pjur Backdoor Anal Lubricants Sexual Health
Image: Pjur Backdoor Anal Lubricants

My favourite lube is the Pjur Back Door relaxing silicone anal glide.

What To Consider When Choosing An Anal Sex Toy

Anal sex toys are extremely varied. Your choice really depends on what you are looking for in an anal experience. For some, it may be just a butt plug that they would like to use but for others (men) they may be more specifically looking for a prostate sex toy. They can come very small, very large and everything in between. The important thing when selecting a sex toy is that it is the right toy for you and where you are up to with your personal experience.

It is also important to consider the anal sex toy’s material. My rule for my own toys is that if it isn’t silicone, glass or something else that I can sterilise I won’t use it. Let’s be real for a second, this is going up your butt and you want to know when you are finished with it that it is clean. Read my article “Material Girl” to learn more about sex toy materials to find which one is right for you.

My Favourite Starter Anal Sex Toy

Anal sex toy by b-Vibe
Buy Now | Anal sex toys by b-Vibe

My favourite starter anal sex toy is the b-Vibe Snug Plug. It is made with medical grade silicone, comes in a variety of sizes and are awesomely weighted inside which makes anal play a little more fun if you ask me.

Parting Tips For Anal Play

  • Relax.
  • Only do it for yourself, it won’t be enjoyable for anyone if you are “just doing it for him”.
  • Take your time, go slow and communicate with your partner.
  • Have fun xoxo

Author: Jamie is a consultant from Oh Zone Adult Lifestyle Centres


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