Whether you are straight or gay sex and sensuality are an important part of the relationship and that over time couples can lose the spark in their sex life. But don’t worry, there are several ways to reignite the passion and excitement in your bedroom.
Whether you are new to relationships or with a partner for several years, your sex life remains an important part of your relationship. Over time couples lose their intimacy and their eroticism.
Here I discuss few ways you can light up the fire in your bedroom.
Gay Sex And Sensuality
Many people guess that gay sex is fabulous and frequent because both partners are men. After all, Hollywood movies are showing us gay men with high sexual pleasure and a big cock that they can’t keep in their pants.
This stereotype has led us to believe that gay men never get bored in the bedroom. Of course, gay couples like all couples, will say that this is not true.
Gay sex life is not that different from straight sex life. Sometimes it can be amazing and unique, and other times it just needs work. By following these guidelines you are ensuring that you will improve your gay sex with your partner.
Sex and Sensuality – What’s Missing?
If you feel sensuality is missing from your relationship, discuss the issue with your partner and discuss things you’d like to try. The more you say, and the more you know about each other, the more sensual sex it is.
If you’re having sex often, you can be certain that you know what both of you like and you both trust each other. You can feel confident being more emotionally open. And letting yourself explore each other each time that you have sex.
Beyond this, you’ll also have had more of a chance to discuss and discover what really turns you and him on.
Patience and Understanding
You both can focus on learning to give and receive pleasure in a way which is not initially sexual. With a loving partner, there won’t be the need or the urgency to have sex fast.
Sex and Sensuality – Take your time on sensual foreplay.
For sensual sex, you need to be fully in touch with yourself. Many aren’t.
You need to be sincere with your feelings. Getting in touch with your feelings goes far beyond sex. Feelings can be shown with a relaxing massage, a day at the spa, a meal with close friends. Or a hot, scented bath with a glass of wine.
It can be about relaxing and closing your eyes to the pace of life while you let your mind wander and discover what you feel.
Maybe create a romantic scene to make love in.
Perhaps just changing the lighting and scent in your bedroom or taking it outdoors. Or it might involve after play, stroking and massaging each other after sex. Sharing a few intimate thoughts.
With a little care, gay sex with a long-term partner can become better and better and more sensual.
You will be able to experience the sensual feelings of the first time with your partner. This way you and your partner will not get bored.
Explore Your Partner
Gay men have the benefit of already knowing their partner’s anatomy, since they have similar body parts. This doesn’t mean that your partner likes the same stuff that you like. But you can explore his body and find out what he loves.
By knowing what teases your partner, you have the advantage of offering pleasure and stimulating his mind.
As a couple you should experiment with new positions. Gay couples having just bottom or top sex is a stereotype. Raise things to a higher level by changing your positions and getting creative.
Let your primal instinct guide you.
Try having sex in public or in a different room in the house and see how it goes. Maybe you prefer experimenting with sex in the shower or in the beach. Be creative and enjoy sex as it meant to be fun.
Sex toys are not just for single people.
There are several ways you can use and enjoy a sex toy as a couple. Consider using a prostate stimulator while performing a 69 with your partner. Experience how anal pleasure can improve stimulation and sex overall.
You can also find several sex toys including dildos, prostate stimulators and vibrating plugs.
There are thousands of amazing and erotic sex aids that can help people improve their sex lives.
If you both enjoy masturbation, why not get masturbation sleeves?
Masturbation sleeves can come equipped with extras or customized with your own designs, and can be truly enjoyed masturbation as a couple.
If you went for a business trip and you don’t have your partner with you. Then you both can use masturbation sleeves over the phone or the internet and have simultaneous orgasms.
Gay Porn for Sex and Sensuality
Other things that can improve your sex life are erotica and porn DVDs. Enjoy written erotic stories. Receive pleasure from visual stimulus while watching a hardcore gay movie with your partner.
Sensuality when you’re having gay sex can be rely upon your feelings of comfort, openness, friendship and love for your partner. And your willingness and ability to indulge in your own feelings of sensual and sexual pleasure.
Your partner may be a complete mystery.
It could be a one night stand or a casual encounter. Casual encounters can be some of the hottest experiences that you can have. Because you’re clearly there for some good hard core sexy fun.
The setting can help or destroy the mood so too will how you behave and what you say to each other.
Many find best to keep the words to a minimum.
The more you or he says the more individual you and he become to each other and th mystery will then fade.
With a partner you do know well, whether in a relationship or otherwise, things can seem to happen in other ways.
Gay First Timers Sex!
Have you got out of the closet recently and are you thinking about having sex with another guy for the first time? You might have some concerns and questions about whether you are ready and what the experience will be like.
Sex can be very important. So it is best to make sure you are ready so that you can receive a positive first experience.
But how can you tell you’re ready? One way is to ask yourself some questions like this.
Are you ready for your first time having gay anal sex?
Chances are if you are reading this it means that you are thinking of having sex. But are you ready emotionally as well as physically?
Have your looked into the intimate ways available including rimming, oral or do you know what is bottom or top? Its obvious how to top or bottom. One person will penetrate and the other will just receive.
How do you know if you’re a man that likes top or bottom?
Are you a good on top or bottom sex positions? And, are you prepared to do either? Some guys can enjoy physical sex without experiencing emotional connections.
Others, however, prefer some level of emotional bonding before being intimate with another partner. Have you thought about where you lay on that?
Do you want to have sex just to please yourself? Am I having sex with the appropriate guy? Or do you want to be emotionally attached to the person you want to have sex with?
Am I comfortable showing my partner my likes and dislikes? Will this lead to something serious? Do I want a relationship or just sex?
The Pressure of Porn
Society puts a lot of pressure on the first time sex as well as the consumption of pornography because people place unrealistic expectations on sexual experiences.
As a result, teens can have high expectations about what they want from the experience. But the first time people have sex doesn’t always feel like it is something special.
Often the first time you have sex it is more of a process for discovery.
Having sex with a man for the first time can be challenging, especially for teens that got out of the closet recently.
You can always use the internet and find information on how to have safer sexual intercourse with a man. Or you can find some techniques that can help you learn or improve your oral sex and other intimate acts. Sex may seem simple like you give, receive and relieve pleasure.
But sex can be far more complicated.
Especially if you’re not prepared. Always remember that sex should be enjoyed and not pushed and done fast.
Discuss with the man you are having sex with. Tell him that you want to follow your pace. There are no fast rules and everyone has a different definition of sex.
Tell him it’s your first time.
This is important because he may push things without realizing that you need a little warm up, and vice a versa. We shouldn’t assume here that your first time will be about bottoming!
Let him know that he needs to take it easy and be gentle with you as it is your first time.
If it’s his first time as well, then you need to be relaxed, gentle and pay attention to his body and what he is saying and feeling.
Discover his body and his emotions and let him discover yours.
Sex can be important for anyone, so you should always take it slowly and make sure that you are emotionally and physically ready for having sex with another man.
There are some simple rules which are to tell you how to begin, where to continue, when to finish and how to get the maximum pleasure from your gay anal sex.
Safety First Always
Once you’ve chosen to have sex, there are a number of ways to reduce the risk of contracting sexually transmitted diseases. You need to know about safety measures.
These days as you can’t be too safe or sure a guy is clean and healthy by the way he looks or from what he says.
Please follow these simple rules to make your first time as easy and enjoyable as possible.
Rules for your first time having gay anal sex
- You should always buy and use condoms. One moment of unprotected intercourse may make you suffer for the rest of your life.
- Use water or silicone based lubricants. Both oils and petroleum jelly reduce any condom protective capacity quickly. The latex deteriorates under the oil. You may lubricate your dick itself or the condom. Remember, you can never have enough lubricant.
- You can always start off with oral sex to make foreplay fun. Pace yourself to make your partner or yourself relaxed.
- Turn foreplay into a game because you have a lot to discover.
Penis Size and Anal Sex
If they are above average in girth or length you may need to take some extra precautions by warming up first with some kind of anal toy.
That will be the only thing that matters when it comes to penis size. The thinner it is the less pain you’ll feel. Though some people can tolerate the initial pain much better than others.
A romantic and slow approach by the person you know is the best remedy from the majority of pains during gay anal sex.
Take your time and Go Slow
Let your body and senses guide you and let go. Go with the flow.
Try not to get anxious because there is no one right way to do it. Start with one finger. Lubricate the anus with the lubricant chosen. If your penis is not that thin wait when until partner’s anus can hold 2 fingers.
After this try to enter your penis.
When you have entered it move slowly. Move it back and forth just a bit. Go deeper slowly. If your partner feels pain, tell him to relax his anal muscles and try to push your penis out, as if he was going to the toilet.
Use particular sex positions
Which let your partner stop the anal intercourse if you are too rough. If you do consider your penis is too small for your partner’s ass try these positions.
- The bottom is lying with his knees under his stomach, with his ass is slightly raised and his anus maximally open. When he lowers his ass, your dick will be squeezed.
- A bottom partner is lying on his stomach. Climb up his ass and enter your penis. In the process, change the penis direction from vertical position to horizontal one.
- The bottom partner is lying on his back. His legs are thrown over your shoulders. Raise his ass and enter it from the front.
- A receiving lover is lying face down, with one knee under his chest. The other knee is taken aside; the leg is stretched and slightly bent. Slide your dick inside.
Some men like to have their penis squeezed.
Squeeze your ass muscles to make him feel the ultimate sexual pleasure. Some men prefer the minimal pressure so relax your ass fully to let your partner go deeper and deeper.
Other men just really like to have both and the pressure being alternated. Try all 3 approaches to find what the best is for your partner. It’s easy to get the simultaneous orgasm for both lovers.
When your partner reaches near orgasm.
Let him stimulate your penis by getting him to jerk you off with the reach around or simply do it yourself. Use some lubricant to reach the full pleasure.
The impact on both his penis and your prostate should make you have your orgasms at the same time.
But if it doesn’t work out that way – do not panic just keep rocking it!
Not all gay men like anal sex!
Despite the common myth, not all gay men like anal sex. Take into consideration that while some gay guys enjoy anal sex, a whole lot of others don’t.
Some mature gay guys just aren’t into anal. They might enjoy oral sex with a partner, mutual masturbation, rimming, frottage and body rubbing or role play. These types of non-penetrative sex can be used as foreplay or to complete intimacy.
Sex is more than just anal penetration.
The first time you have sex with another guy doesn’t have to be the first time you try out every sex act you have ever heard of. Sex can be very important for you.
Hopefully, having more information will help you have the safest and most enjoyable experience during your first sexual encounter with a man.
Author: Stephen Smith – BA Of Social Sciences, M.Ed
Meet PJ Weir, former Gay Exchange stalwart and gay rights advocate. Now caring for his mother in Queensland, he reflects on a decade of LGBTQ+ activism.
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