Coming out for the first time is a huge step for any queer person. Many come out at a young age but there are so many who haven’t yet had their queer outing. For various reasons, many decide to come out later in life.
I say coming out for the first time, because ‘coming out’ is not a singular event.
Indeed, a queer person may have to come out every day for the rest of their lives.
Why?
Because since people don’t wear a neon sign on their person stating their gender, their orientation is assumed in a heteronormative world.
It is assumed that when you say you are in a relationship, then that partner is of the opposite sex. At this moment a decision must be made to ‘come out’ and correct their gendered assumption, or to let it pass.
This is a conscious decision generally made whenever one comes into contact with another person.
Queer Outing – It’s a Powerful Statement
When you read articles like what happened with the Rio Olympics Queer Outing. Or see someone stating that being Queer is a tiring process, this is just one of the aspects that they mean.
To come out is a powerful statement
Coming out is a process which must be carefully considered to determine the worth of the correction and to determine the safety of the situation.
Whilst coming out may not necessarily result in physical violence, it could result in sub-par service in a business establishment, a negative social reaction, a passing of promotion or career opportunities in a workplace.
Negative Repercussions
We have all seen through the news, or a friend, the often negative repercussions that have occurred as a result of ‘coming out’. This may be consciously coming out by telling someone, or giving a public display of affection with their same sex partner.
For this reason, many people decide not to continually come out.
They may hide or repress that particular aspect of them in a certain situation. Or they may be deceptive and cagey.
They may outright lie to protect themselves.
A lot of these decisions come down to the context. A decision to come out is a deeply personal one, which is why it can be devastating to be ‘outed’ by someone else.
This lack of control of ones situation can be confronting, damaging, and downright dangerous.
Rio Olympics Queer Outing
This is why the world reacted so harshly against the actions of the Rio Olympics journalist Nico Hines, who outrageously gay-baited Olympic athletes.
Gay-Baiting means posing as a queer individual and then flirting, or displaying a sexual interest in the person to see how they respond. Effectively ‘outing’ them, despite the knowledge that they themselves are straight.
It is a deceptive practice and most of the time has drastically negative results.
Backlash of Rio Olympics Queer Outing
The severe backlash of the Rio Olympics Queer Outing stems from several issues here.
Firstly, the lack of professional conduct in the obvious development of a click baiting story. There was no merit or value to the article except to increase traffic to the website the article was published for, The Daily Beast.
Secondly, the article which came across as blatantly sleazy and homophobic. Howard Stern, writer for the Slate, sums it up neatly when he states that Hines has written,
‘About the whole thing in a tone of mocking yet lurid condescension’
It further assumes the promiscuity of the gay population
Hines states that he had tried other dating apps without success. He repeatedly, and blatantly proclaims his heterosexuality as justification for his Rio Olympics Queer Outing.
And that despite this heterosexuality, him being on Grindr did not mean that he was not being honest and that he told people who he was when they asked.
Since Grindr is often used as an instant sex application, people don’t always ask the identity of the person with whom they are speaking to.
This article was to identify the activity of sex within the Olympic village
Which seems to not be newsworthy but rather ‘entertainment’ for the writer. A third issue, and one that the writer blatantly acknowledges whilst ignoring, is the danger that he has placed these athletes in.
He does not reveal their names, but lists their identifying features, the sports they are in and the countries from which they are from.
Hines even acknowledges that being gay in some of the athletes home countries is punishable by law.
What then possesses Hines to out these athletes whilst ignoring the physical danger that he has subsequently placed them in?
Ignoring the fact that they may not identify as being gay but was rather after some companionship. What right does this writer have to so aggressively out them? Whilst at the same time acknowledging the dangers he has placed them in and proclaiming his own heterosexuality?
What point is there to it?
These are athletes representing their country in the field of sports
Their sexuality, or whom they choose to engage in sexual relations with is not newsworthy. Rather it is speculative, dangerous and harmful to athletes who have done nothing wrong.
Coming out is a deeply personal thing as well as being an incredibly powerful moment.
To rob that of someone who has chosen to remain closeted should be considered the ultimate disrespect to a queer person.
Especially when the person outing them has heterosexual privilege and has no understanding, or comprehension of the dangers that outing someone can inflict.
Rio may be viewed as a safe haven for some athletes
Upon their return to their home country if they have been found out there could be severe repercussions including loss of sponsorship, public dis-ownment, dis-ownment from family and friends.
The list goes on.
These are just some of the things that Hines claims he has considered by acknowledging the dangers of Rio Olympics Queer Outing, but still outing them.
In many countries around the world, being gay or queer isn’t necessarily considered to be such a big deal.
There are still many countries in the world where it is a big deal and has severe social repercussions.
Our world is already a tough enough place without a journalistic using queer athletes as a form of entertainment.
Author: Stephen Smith – BA Of Social Sciences, M.Ed
From Paris to Sydney: The World’s Most Romantic Gay Travel Destinations
Are you searching for a romantic gay travel destinations to share with your partner?
Look no further than the world’s most romantic gay destinations! From the charming streets of Paris to the sunny beaches of Sydney, these cities offer the perfect blend of culture, adventure, and romance.
You may be looking to indulge in a decadent meal, explore historic landmarks or simply soak up the local atmosphere. Each of these destinations has something unique to offer.
Get ready to pack your bags whilst we explore.
Traveling to Romantic Gay Travel Destinations
Before we dive into the most romantic gay destinations around the world, here are a few tips for traveling as a gay couple.
While many destinations are welcoming and inclusive, it’s always important to do your research and take precautions to ensure a safe and enjoyable trip.
Be aware of the local laws and customs. In some countries, homosexuality is illegal, so it’s important to know the risks before you travel. It’s a good idea to research gay-friendly hotels and neighborhoods.
As well as any LGBT events or festivals that may be taking place during your visit.
Be respectful of the local culture and customs.
While many destinations are welcoming to LGBT travelers, be mindful of local attitudes and beliefs. Dress modestly in more conservative countries, and avoid public displays of affection in areas where it may not be accepted.
Paris: The City of Love
When it comes to romance, few cities can compare to Paris. The City of Love has long been a favorite destination for couples of all orientations, with its charming streets, iconic landmarks, and world-renowned cuisine.
For gay couples, Paris offers a wealth of experiences, from strolling hand-in-hand along the Seine to exploring the city’s vibrant LGBT scene. Its Marais district is a popular destination for gay travelers, with its trendy cafes, boutique shops, and lively nightlife.
Of course, no trip to Paris would be complete without a visit to the Eiffel Tower, one of the most romantic landmarks in the world.
For an unforgettable experience, book a table at one of the tower’s restaurants and enjoy a candlelit dinner with stunning views of the city.
Sydney: A Gay-Friendly Destination
If you’re looking for a romantic getaway with plenty of sunshine and stunning scenery, Sydney is the perfect destination.
Australia’s largest city is known for its vibrant LGBT community and welcoming atmosphere, with plenty of gay-friendly hotels, bars, and restaurants.
For a truly romantic experience, head to Bondi Beach, one of Sydney’s most iconic destinations. Relax on the beach, take a dip in the ocean, or explore the nearby coastal walk for breathtaking views of the coastline.
For a taste of Sydney’s thriving LGBT scene, head to Oxford Street, home to some of the city’s best bars and clubs.
Annual Sydney Gay and Lesbian Mardi Gras is also a must-see event, with thousands of people flocking to the city for the colorful parade and lively celebrations.
Mykonos: The Party Island
If you’re looking for a romantic getaway with a party atmosphere, Mykonos is the place to be.
This Greek island is known for its lively nightlife and stunning beaches, making it a popular destination for gay travelers.
For a truly unforgettable experience, head to Super Paradise Beach, one of the most popular gay beaches in the world. Relax on the sandy beach, take a dip in the crystal-clear water, or enjoy a cocktail at one of the beachfront bars.
When the sun goes down, Mykonos comes alive with some of the best nightlife in Europe.
The island is home to a number of gay bars and clubs, including Jackie O’ and Babylon, which are known for their lively parties and stunning views of the Aegean Sea.
Amsterdam: A Cultural Experience
For a romantic getaway that’s as rich in culture as it is in romance, Amsterdam is the perfect destination. This picturesque city is known for its stunning architecture, world-class museums, and vibrant LGBT community.
One of the most romantic experiences in Amsterdam is a canal cruise, which takes you through the city’s picturesque waterways and past some of its most iconic landmarks.
For a truly special experience, book a private cruise with a candlelit dinner and champagne.
Amsterdam’s LGBT scene is also thriving, with a number of gay bars and clubs scattered throughout the city. Reguliersdwarsstraat is a popular destination for gay travelers, with its trendy bars and lively parties.
Bangkok: The Exotic Getaway
For a romantic getaway that’s a little more exotic, Bangkok is the perfect destination. This bustling city is known for its vibrant culture, delicious cuisine, and stunning temples.
One of the most romantic experiences in Bangkok is a visit to the Grand Palace, a stunning complex of buildings that was once home to the King of Thailand. The palace is home to a number of temples and museums, as well as the famous Emerald Buddha.
When it comes to LGBT culture, Bangkok has a thriving scene, with a number of gay bars and clubs scattered throughout the city. Silom district is a popular destination for gay travelers, with its trendy bars and lively parties.
Cape Town: A Romantic Adventure
If you’re looking for a romantic getaway with a little adventure, Cape Town is the perfect destination. This stunning city is known for its breathtaking scenery, world-class wine, and vibrant LGBT community.
One of the most romantic experiences in Cape Town is a visit to Table Mountain, which offers stunning views of the city and surrounding landscape. For a truly special experience, book a private helicopter tour and enjoy a bird’s eye view of the city and coastline.
Cape Town’s LGBT scene is also thriving, with a number of gay bars and clubs scattered throughout the city. De Waterkant district is a popular destination for gay travelers, with its trendy bars and lively parties.
Rio de Janeiro: Beaches and Nightlife
For a romantic getaway with plenty of sun, sand, and nightlife, Rio de Janeiro is the perfect destination. This vibrant city is known for its stunning beaches, lively culture, and world-famous carnival.
One of the most romantic experiences in Rio de Janeiro is a visit to Copacabana Beach, one of the most iconic beaches in the world.
Relax on the sandy beach, take a dip in the crystal-clear water, or enjoy a cocktail at one of the beachfront bars.
When the sun goes down, Rio comes alive with some of the best nightlife in South America. The Lapa district is a popular destination for gay travelers, with its lively bars and clubs.
Annual Rio Carnival is also a must-see event, with thousands of people flocking to the city for the colorful parade and lively celebrations.
A Romantic Getaway
Whether you’re looking for a romantic getaway with plenty of culture, adventure, or nightlife, these destinations offer something for everyone.
From the charming streets of Paris to the sunny beaches of Sydney, each of these destinations is sure to leave you feeling enchanted and in love all over again.
So pack your bags, grab your sweetheart, and get ready to explore the world’s most romantic gay destinations.
Meet Stephen, a bold and opinionated cis-gendered gay advocate for gender equality and sexual education. Join him on the Adultsmart blog for fearless insights.
Leave a Reply