I’m starting back with a masturbation challenge for July which I thought it would be fun to do for myself and then also I realise would be fun for you guys too!! (And make a great article).
I realize we’re 11 days into July but if you’re really keen you can just go 11 days into August…
Masturbation Challenge: Wank Your Way Through the Month
Are you finding that you have to do the same things every time in order to orgasm? Or maybe it’s easier to just do the same things every time because it works?
Maybe it’s time to get to know yourself or your partner better with a little July Challenge…
We’re all guilty of it. The usual, the standard, the routine, doing the same things. Whether it be during masturbation, sex with a partner or friend, or even in less sexual aspects of life.
We are all guilty of at some point doing the same things every time.
Granted, it’s because we know that they work.
Maybe you know that if you put your We-Vibe tango vibrator flat side down, just above your clit you can have an orgasm in less than 3 minutes EVERY time.
Or if you manipulate your Chrome Curve at that particular angle, and thrust as fast as your poor little arms can thrust you’ll be done in 30 seconds.
What about those of us who’re feeling like we should mix up our routine or trying something different?
It’s time to set yourself a challenge, and what better time to start than the beginning of a new month.
Open your mind to the possibility of trying new sex things whether it be with a partner, friend or by yourself. Challenge yourself to masturbate faster or maybe even slower.
Get yourself out of that rut!
Here is an example of a weekly sex challenge that makes sex a little bit more interesting.
Below you will find a list of things to try to get yourself out of your Masturbation routine
First and foremost
Switch up the kind of orgasms that you typically enjoy. Do you find that you can only orgasm from clitoral stimulation? Or maybe only from G Spot stimulation?
Maybe you need both simultaneously. Either way, change it up.
Spend some time getting to know your body and practice, (yes practice), stimulating other parts of your body.
Most likely, at first you will find it hard to orgasm, if at all.
This is most likely a mental obstacle so make sure you’re really relaxed and have enough time to really get to know yourself. Try having multiple orgasms, or a prostate orgasm (for males). Have an orgasm from thought only. Trust me – it’s a thing to experience.
Change your environment
Get out of your bedroom and try masturbating in a different environment. Start with the bathroom, or the living room, then try getting more adventurous like in the garden or in your car.
Trust me, there’s no better thrill than the slight chance that you might get caught!
Find a new ‘turn on’
What do you normally do to get yourself in the mood? Watch porn? Read erotica?
Or maybe even nothing at all. Switch it up and find something new that you’ve never even thought of using as stimulus before.
Pay attention to how it affects your sexual response and be surprised when you aren’t a one trick pony!
Go back to basics
We’re all guilty of using the same tools every time to get ourselves off. Go back to the basics.
Use your hands and trust the fact that people have been using the same method for centuries – be patient. If you’re a tango gal, don’t be surprised when your fingers don’t start vibrating at the touch of the button.
Refer to tip number 1 and be patient. If you ONLY use your hands, do the opposite of what I said. Get your ass into your closest adultsmart store and grab yourself a versatile toy like the Mona 2 and experiment with what feels right.
These are just a few ideas to get you started…
If you don’t do anything halfheartedly (guilty as charged!) get yourself a calendar and set daily challenges, or even weekly challenges to overcome.
Or if you’re a little too busy for that, set yourself mental challenges to overcome.
HAVE FUN, and don’t be surprised when you realise there are so many more ways to masturbate than you originally thought.
Mutual Masturbation
Masturbation has long been proven to be an effective tool in our arsenal for self care, self exploration and all things considered. It is very safe sex alternative.
Recently with social media, gaining trends and more positive discussion and open sexuality, masturbation is rising above the stigma that has unfairly surrounded it in the past decades.
And so it should be.
Masturbation is amazing.
A very under-rated facet of masturbation that does not get anywhere near enough of the spotlight is mutual masturbation.
When we think of mutual masturbation what first pops to head is long distance relationships, sharing an erotic phone call or scandalous skype/Facetime video call in nothing but your birthday suit.
Or at least that is what most people thought of when I asked them as I went to write this article.
These forms of mutual masturbation are very mutual and very sexy, hot and heedy.
I love them, I love the ability that it brings to long distance relationships, or even not to long distance ones. Out for the night?
Send something sexy and masturbate together. The principle of finding each other simultaneously arousing enough to bring you pleasure and climax even though you’re apart.
Bellissimo.
There are even more and more sex toys that are tailored to making the most of long distance masturbation like Lovense, Kiroo and We Vibe.
But that was not the type of mutual masturbation I’m talking about
The type that definitely should be explored more, talked about more and definitely used more. Mutual Masturbation in real life involves more than one person enjoying themselves, together in the same room.
It may sound like an oxymoron, but trust me, it isn’t.
If anything, it may be one of the most intimate things you can do with your partner(s). Watching your play partner giving themselves pleasure, while you give yourself pleasure, and they watch you.
Let’s start by looking at why this is such an intimate mode of sexual exploration.
Yes, sexual intercourse is very intimate. It is the joining of your bodies and it is creating connection. When we masturbate, we masturbate usually with thoughts or stimuli that turn us on.
These can be things like porn videos, stories, memories, fantasies, dreams.
How often can you say though, that the object of your arousal is in front of you a breath away, watching you pleasure yourself, watching you get aroused by their presence?
Intimate Right?
Mutual Masturbation also brings out that tiny little piece of us that some may be curious about, Voyeurism and exhibitionism but without the crowded audience or public.
Voyeurism is the act of watching others participating in sexual exploits and Exhibitionism is enjoying being watched.
Mutual masturbation is a brilliant avenue to learn about your play partner and for them to learn about you too.
What better way to learn what a person likes, how they get off, what their spots are, how they like being caressed, then to actually see them doing so?
To make matters even sexier, you can hear it too.
No need to hold back. Using your words to help tell the story can only enhance your experience.
Expressing gratitude at the sight, the sound, the enjoyment of the moment or the sight of certain things either of you are doing may be enough to tip you over the edge.
This can also be a wonderful foray into using sex toys.
Have you been nervous about using sex toys during sex?
Using toys during mutual masturbation may be the key. This is your time to showcase your tips and tricks. If you wanted to, you could even request your play partner to use something.
The reason this is a good and neutral ground to try out incorporating toys can be numerous. Some partners may feel intimidated by the use of sex toys in their usual repertoire.
Using sex toys during mutual masturbation will highlight the pleasure but also highlight that that pleasure is not taking away from the connection and the intimacy with your play partner.
It is an extension of you
If you have been worried about the logistics, this is also a trial run in how you can figure out how to best incorporate the toys into your routine.
And just think, how sexy is it to say or hear “Oh I wish I could taste you while using this toy.” or “I want to feel you inside me while using this”.
I can definitely see how a person would feel aroused at these prospects.
Sex toys are an extension of ourselves not replacements.
Mutual Masturbation doesn’t need to end here though. It can be part one, the first course.
You don’t simply need to strictly never touch each other, that is the beauty of this. It may evolve organically into sharing the touch, sharing an orgasm, together, helping each other orgasm.
Who says you can’t kiss while you share this intimate experience?
There are no rules, you make them yourself.
This is a type of exploration that demands more positive discussion. That being said, it can be very daunting to expose yourself during your most private pleasures, even to your closest person.
If you would like to try mutual masturbation but your play partner is hesitant, do not be disheartened. Take it slow, try broaching the subject such as would you like to watch me masturbate (or cum).
You could try watching porn/videos together, reading salacious stories together and inviting them to show you what they like.
Like all acts, consent is important, but it can also take time.
Remember, we are coming out of an era where masturbation was still taught as bad. So for many people, masturbation was a private act and when they masturbated, they kept it private so that they would not be reprimanded or judged.
Being public about masturbation, even in your relationship may be a big step for some people. Be kind and be open and understanding.
Show them this article, and let’s start the conversation.
Bring masturbation and mutual masturbation out of the darkness.
Meet Rick, Adultsmart’s owner with 35+ years in the adult industry. A sex blogger, advocate for gender and sexuality equality, offering a diverse product range.
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